So this weekend we had a 30 hour famine. Overall it went okay, but it did not help the fact that I am sick and that I went without food for 30 hours. But I only have two days of classes this week, so I am psyched about that. I need sleep, and to do my OT homework. I wonder which will come first….

I was talking about this the other night, to relate a pop song and a psalm with my thoughts in the blog. It was pretty cool — try it….

I am going to start with a song — Losing my Religion by REM

Every whisper
Of every waking hour I’m
Choosing my confessions
Trying to keep an eye on you
Like a hurt lost and blinded fool
Oh no I’ve said too much
I set it up

Consider this
The hint of the century
Consider this
The slip that brought me
To my knees failed
What if all these fantasies
Come flailing around
Now I’ve said too much
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

But that was just a dream
That was just a dream

I guess when I was looking through I tunes I this song just poped out at me. Reflecting on the end of our second year, getting ready for internship, moving, ending my job, and whatever else might pop up in the next couple of months. I feel like this is somewhat of a dream, I feel that we have to choose our confessions — what we believe in and proclaim it to the world. No matter how much seminary thinks they prepare us, in the end we are not going to have our professors to fall back on. Or as I like to say to have the “theological gods looking over our sholders” it is going to be on us. That excites me but scares me as well.
Lastly, I think that this experience they call seminary has brought me too my knees. I have felt every kind of emotion and I have been humbled by the whole experience. I have done things I never thought I could do, and other things I wish I never did. But in the end I am on my knees thanking God, cursing God and being humbled by just a hint of God’s presence in my life.

I have been wrestling with this psalm for awhile and it just fits in with what I have been talking about:
Psa. 139:0 To the leader. Of David. A Psalm.
1 O LORD, you have searched me and known me.
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from far away.
3 You search out my path and my lying down,
and are acquainted with all my ways.
4 Even before a word is on my tongue,
O LORD, you know it completely.
5 You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
it is so high that I cannot attain it.

I was reading over my post, I just want to make clear that I don’t think that anyone has been a “bad” friend to me. if there is any blame it should be on me. I understand there are life changes and that things have their cycle. I think I am in that down cycle and I hope that I can come back up. that’s all…..

While I do have a Bonhoeffer paper to work on, I decided that I would write this down since it is all that is going through my head right now.

I have been thinking a lot about friends lately. Maybe it is because I miss my friends, maybe it is because my friends have been doing certain things that I have not been included on, maybe it is because I am going to miss another one of my friends bachelor parties because I have to preach on that Sunday….Whatever it is I have been thinking about it a lot lately.

I have many different circles of friends and they have overlapped a few times in my life. I have my friends from Rutland– two of which I am still close too. I have my friends from college. I only really talk with one friend who now lives in Cali — it kinda makes me sad that the rest don’t respond to e-mails or letters but I will get over it. I have my friends from camp — these are the friends that I consider my best friends and now I have my friends from seminary. I consider these some of my great friends as well and I know I will have these friends for a long time.

I am fusterated not with my friends from home or college or even seminary but I am fusterated because I can’t see/be with my friends from camp. It is crazy how much I need that interaction with them from time to time. And maybe there is more that I can do, I don’t know. But it seems like lately we have gone in our own directions. I know some are married and now I have a child (only one so far) and life is not like it was when we were 16 or even 20. I understand life changes but there was a certain time when I just felt that there was nothing that could separate us. To an extent that is true and it is more true for some than others. I guess we all have priorities and I never thought that mine would not put my friends near the top of the list.

My question is has seminary taken my friends away from me? Between my family and seminary and work — does that mean that I can’t make time for them? It is hard because there is not only the time factor of trying to get work done and school done and everything else that life demands but there is also the distance factor, some of my friends are a 5 -6 hour car ride and others are a 5-6 hour plane ride. It just seems crazy that this could separate us……

When I sit down recently and think about the stuff that “Bothers” me and sometimes I think that seminary takes the “fun” out of faith for me. I think the thing that my heart longs for the most might not be the faith interaction that I have with the kids or adults that I come in contact with. Even though that is a big thing — I think it is also the relationships that comes with working at camp. It is the nights out, the days off, the goofing off while stealing a 7 foot sign 30 feet up in the air. I miss the long nights talking on the beach or in the dining hall. I miss the hugs and faces of pure pleasure and the thoughts that this is a never ending friendship. I miss knowing that if there is anything that I need, at any time during the day I can call these guys up knowing that they would be at my doorstep ready to fight without any questions asked.
While I don’t fully believe that is gone, sometimes that seems like a distant memory.

Soon I will be celebrating the marriage of one of my friends. It is going to be good to see everyone again, I know that the weekend is going to be full of stories, memories remembered and new ones made. But I hope that sometime soon there will be more opportunities to bask in the glory of friendship, of faith in eachother and love for one another. I hope that I can fill this heart that is not broken, but maybe has a few holes where love and REason once made a home.

Here is a Pic of Logan feeding Becca an apple or something….kinda funny….perhaps Becca would not want me to post this, but she never reads my blog….so shhhhh don’t tell

I dont’ know excatly what is going on with Logan here (yes he is wearing an Eagles jersey) but I thought it was a funny pic. It looks like he is going to get hit with something…..

I thought you all might enjoy those pics. My friend Ralph has “challenged” his blog readers to post a psalm and pop song on his blog….I think I will do that and post it here. I also have been going through old notes and files from seminary and I am compiling a list of thoughts on my seminary experience so far. I don’t think I can sum it all up within the next two months (how much longer until my internship starts….but I am going to start reflecting upon that sort of stuff.

For those who do read this, my challenge to you is a psalm/pop song reflection in my comment area. If you have any questions as to what that might look like, stay tuned to my blog tomorrow or check out Ralph’s blog…..

John 2:13-25

13The Passover of the Jews was near, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. 14In the temple he found people selling cattle, sheep, and doves, and the money changers seated at their tables. 15Making a whip of cords, he drove all of them out of the temple, both the sheep and the cattle. He also poured out the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables. 16He told those who were selling the doves, “Take these things out of here! Stop making my Father’s house a marketplace!” 17His disciples remembered that it was written, “Zeal for your house will consume me.” 18The Jews then said to him, “What sign can you show us for doing this?” 19Jesus answered them, “Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up.” 20The Jews then said, “This temple has been under construction for forty-six years, and will you raise it up in three days?” 21But he was speaking of the temple of his body. 22After he was raised from the dead, his disciples remembered that he had said this; and they believed the scripture and the word that Jesus had spoken.

23When he was in Jerusalem during the Passover festival, many believed in his name because they saw the signs that he was doing. 24But Jesus on his part would not entrust himself to them, because he knew all people 25and needed no one to testify about anyone; for he himself knew what was in everyone.

Slam Ball.

This is a basketball game unlike any other. It is basketball for the Millennium generation, with action that looks like one extended highlight clip after another. It’s full of instant dunks, instant air and instant gratification.

The secret: trampolines imbedded in the court, in front of the baskets.

A player named Sean Jackson, better known as “Inches,” is one of the new stars of this brand-new extreme basketball league. In Slam Ball, Inches is not limited by the normal constraints of the game — he can perform jaw-dropping 360 degree, through-the-legs, windmill jams. “It’s just like I dreamed about in street ball,” he tells The New York Times, “that I could do a certain dunk in midair, and the man I just dunked on was Michael Jordan.”

Slam Ball. It’s all about fulfilling dreams. It combines the flying freedom of a trampoline, the fantasy of stepping into a video game and the adrenaline rush of an extreme sport.

The game is played on a custom-made court that is 94 feet long and 55 feet wide, with baskets 10 feet high and four trampolines in the court in front of the baskets. Players wear soft helmets and body padding, since midair contact is allowed, and they concentrate their efforts on bouncing, leaping, hitting and dunking.

“Conceptually, it sounds like a wild and crazy and wacky idea,” says Mason Gordon, the creator of Slam Ball, “but when you put a bunch of sports into a blender, it works.” The players of Slam ball experience twenty minuets of chaos – Running around, shooting, jumping and colliding with one another.

In today’s gospel we hear Jesus stepping onto a different court during Passover, he steps onto the temple court in Jerusalem. However, the similarity is the chaos he finds within that court. Millions of people were coming to Jerusalem to get ready for Passover. Passover commemorates God’s liberation of the Israelites from Egypt, one of the greatest events in its history.

But instead of finding people preparing themselves spiritually for the event — Jesus found entrepreneurs selling cattle, sheep and doves, and others changing money at their tables. Upon finding this Jesus Made a whip of cords, he drove the sheep and the cattle out of the temple. He also pours out the coins of the moneychangers and overturns their tables, before saying; “Take these things out of here! Stop making my Father’s houses a marketplace!” (John 2:13-16). Jesus did not want them to sell things in order to make a prophet in the temple. That would be like having a billboard sign in the front of our church advertising for Nike, or Pepsi or instead of our hymnals having a green, or blue cover they would be covered with stickers for different organizations in the community. It was not only about what they were doing but about how they were doing it…..the people selling were trying to take advantage of the travelers, they thought it was going to be easy to sell their items for high prices and no one would know the difference but Jesus knew.

This is a different side of Jesus. We are use to seeing Jesus acting very calm and holding his composure. But this is a different scene as well. If you can imagine yourself among the different business immersed in his surroundings. There are people running into one another there is yelling, selling perhaps crying or fighting. It probably seems like a mad house. There is no control by anyone — until Jesus steps in. Jesus takes control and drives the evil out of the temple.

Lent can be a time of reflection, preparation and the recognition of the wonderful things Jesus does for us in our lives, things that no matter what we do Jesus is going to continue to do. Also it is a time to think about the upcoming death and resurrection of Christ. But like the temple court and the Slam ball court we can find ourselves being push around and crashing in midair in the midst of chaos – we feel like we have no control over our lives. We get caught up in running between appointments, studying for tests, doing homework, taking care of the kids, paying the bills – we sometimes forget to take time for ourselves. We sometimes forget to give up our control and to let Jesus take control.

Lent is a time for us to sit back and remember the things that God has done for us in our lives – to remember the things that God has freed us from…..

When wee feel like we want to overturn the tables in our marketplaces, to start again – We hear God’s voice echoing from the Old Testament lesson “I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery;” But it is hard to accept that because we become so consumed in our day to day lives to really pay attention.

The season of Lent enables us to take a step back and to revaluate — I know for me this Lenten season I have taken the time for reflection – I have started an online journaling experience called a blog. I am attempting to write in my blog every day during lent. While some might find this cumbersome and restrictive, I have found it to be very refreshing and renewing. I have been able to reflect on the day, to see where God is acting in my life and somehow my life seems less chaotic and crazy.
One of my first entries I wrote, “I do not know what I am going to write about in here, I have always wanted to keep a journal, but I never know what to write. I guess we will see what comes out.” Two weeks later I realize how much I do write, how much I look forward to writing and finding that Jesus is in my daily actions and how much – without full knowledge am comforted by Jesus’ presence.

Others I know have Taken upon the ELCA “Here I Step” challenge which By walking two miles a day during the 40 days of Lent their journey the 80 miles from Jesus’ hometown of Nazareth to the city of Jerusalem. For them it is also a time to escape the realities of the world and to spend their devotional time with God.

We are freed out of the love of God for us not by what we do or do not do. Our devotional time does not earn God’s favor but only enabling another way to see God’s love in our lives. A love that is there regardless if we do devotionals or not and A love that leads to freedom and salvation.

Freedom for us can be found in the Ten Commandments – before the Ten Commandments are given God freed the people from slavery…. God did not say to us here are your commandments and if you follow them THEN I will free you. Inst
ea
d God said — I will free you, I choose you FIRST and I will give you eternal life…

God reinforces that God is the only true God; the God freed us and who has brought us salvation. That salvation came through Jesus – who when he was questioned about the destruction and resurrection of the temple Jesus shifts attention from the temple in Jerusalem, to the temple of his own body, which will be destroyed on the cross and then raised in three days.

For years, the temple has been the place of God’s presence on earth … but now, with the coming of Christ, the body of Jesus is where God is seen most clearly – after the resurrection of Jesus – through the eyes of the disciples and then passed down to us.

The freedom of slavery out of Egypt and the presentation of the Ten Commandments is like going to the Emergency Room…..
No matter who you are, where you come from, or what kind of insurance you have, you are always going to get treatment from the emergency room doctors. They are going to fix you and make you better, no questions asked. But there is a bill after the treatment, but insurance, like grace is there to pick up the bill.

Through the story of the overturned tables in marketplace we see another side of Jesus and we need to let Jesus’ full humanness sit within us.

Jesus didn’t get angry when he was tired, exhausted and all worn out. That is what we often do when we are tired and exhausted. When we do not have the time for ourselves….. But this was not the cause of Jesus’ anger.

Rather Jesus got angry when he saw injustice and irreverence. He got angry when he saw people charging outrageous prices for the animals and when he saw how people were desecrating the temple, God’s house. He got angry when he saw their lack of respect and lack of reverence.

When we are getting pushed around in our lives, for one reason or another, we too feel that anger, that frustration of lost control.

But this wasn’t the end of the story about his anger. We are suspicious that many of these same people who were in the temple selling goods at unjust prices were also at the cross on Good Friday, watching Jesus being crucified. Jesus prayed to God, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.”

In our busy social world of the twenty first century, it seems that the Presence of God is being moved to the margins and to the sidelines. Even within our temples, we have often forgotten how to pray to God but simply chat with other people seated around us, or to take on the demands of the world, demands that sometimes seem overwhelming, and forget about God.

It can be easy to forget that God’s love, and grace is always around us – God creates order in our lives that sometimes may seem chaotic like a game of slam ball —- and God first chooses us to be free from the bondage of slavery into eternal life – For it is not up to us to do anything to earn our salvation because it has already been given to us by the death of God’s son Jesus on the Cross.

Amen

For those who don’t know much about Vermont or what it means to be a vermonter here is some info….

If you are a TRUE VERMONTER:

1.Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on
route 7.
2. Vacation means going to Burlington for the weekend.
3. You measure distance in hours.
4. You know several people who have hit moose more than once.
5. You often switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
6. You use a down comforter in the summer.
7. Your grandparents drive at 65 mph through 13 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.
8. You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events.
9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
10. You think of the major food groups as deer meat, beer, fish, and berries.
11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at the K-mart store at any given time!
13. You design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
15. You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and flannel pajamas.
16. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and
construction.
17. It takes you 3 hours to go to the store for one item even when
you’re in a rush because you have to stop and talk to everyone in town.
18. You actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your friends from Vermont
19. your idea of a graduation party is a keg in the backwoods with some friends.
20. 10 degrees is considered a warm day.
21. the christmas lights are on the house year round.
22. you know the three ways of hunting deer: sitting in a tree stand (boring), stalking the deer (hard as hell), and hitting it with your truck (by far the easiest and most full proof way).
23. you know February vaction was first made for people who sugar.
24. you think the bigger the truck the better
25. you say idear and milt’n
26. you think a winter with only 2 feet of snow at a time is a mild winter.
27. you or your parents don’t fully grasp the concept of internet.
28. you know you can buy a bong legally and you know where to get them.
29. you are used to the smell of cow manure.
30. you learned to drive when you could first reach the pedals.
31. you wait up all night just to shoot pesky racoons
32. you or your parents own more then 3 guns.
33. you have to travel for at least 30 minutes to get any good clothes.
34. you think camo clothes, suspenders and flannel are “in style”.
35. you get annoyed when people think vermont is part of canada, but you yourself think new mexico is part of central america and its the updated version of mexico.
36. you make some of your own furniture.
37. you’ve at least tipped one cow in your life.
38. you’ve skinny dipped at least once in lake champlain.
39. you get immense fun out of setting off any kind of firework.
40. you know the few roads into canada no-one appears to know about.
41. you drink water from your own well.
42. within a mile of where you live you can find a cow.
43. you know at least one person with the last name “manahan”
44. ain’t is part of your common vocabulary.

The next couple of days I am going to be working on a lot of stuff so I am pulling some humerous things together for my blog, and some pictures for the weekend. But next week I will share more of what I am working on, it will be good.

So there has been alot of action in the last day or so.

First I had to get new glasses. I think I mentioned Logan breaking my current pair. Well We went to sears and dropped a big bill to get a new pair. I could of simmed some things like trying to get just a new frame, getting a not so nice looking pair to save on costs or to not get the warranty but we got all of that. And in the end I am happy with our decision, it is going to be a little tougher money wise but things will be okay I think. If this pair can last until I get out of seminary then I will be happy.

I don’t know this thought is good or not but I think about alot of things “as long as this can last until after seminary we will be okay” It comes through our cars, funiture, health, life, ect. It is not like we are going to be rolling in the dough once seminary is over, but I can at least have a decent income, Katie can contineu her education part time and work full time and I have a feeling that our income will greatly increase while expenses will decrease or remain the same. My hope is that our car payment will be done and be replaced with stuent loans (same amount). Maybe this is my pipe dream but I hope not.

So my feet are not doing so well today. I have had some problems but I now have a gash on my heal and it hurts to walk. I wore my sandles yesterday and that might be a part of it. My sandles are crap, and I should not of worn them (isn’t hindsight great) but I did and now I have this problem. I wanted to work out this morning but I could not becuase of walking. So I cleaned up the house a bit and now I am going to do some school work. Maybe I can go swimming this afternoon, but I know the pool is crowded in the afternoon. As long as I go Saturday I will count this as my “day off”

I have to work on my Bonhoeffer paper this weekend. I am somewhat regreting a term paper vs. short papers during the year. But as long as I can bang out 7-8 pages this weekend I should be good. I am pretty confident I can do that. Tomorrow I should spend in the library for the majority of the day. I don’t have anything going on until tomorrow night when I have this stupid gospel choir concert to go too. I am not looking forward ot the concert. Granted I LOVE gospel music and I like what we are singing but I think it is the people behind the concert and how last year it was a big deal with the organizers using our class money for their personal amition saying it was a “class project” when in fact it was only four people doing it.

Lost was awesome last night!! There are so many things that were brought up and I think it is crazy!!! I can’t process it right now. I did do some research this morning and there were some great leads. I will fill everyone in as time goes on.

well I should get going but I hope to write more tonight.

So I did some searching today of some other blogs online. I typed in “Lutheran” and I found some pretty interesting ones.
I think there are some great people out there who are trying to proclaim the gospel within their blog. I really commend that. I think that is very note worthy. I right now, mainly proclaim what I do on a day to day basis. I think that is good for what I can do at this point. I hope things change though.

Well it is almost 11pm and it kinda stinks that once 11 comes my body decides to shut down. Unless I have something really going on where I have to stay up and focus. But then it is doing anything I can to stay awake. that is not healthy for me.

Well I am off to bed, I liked getting up early to go to the gym. I think I am going to do it again tomorrow.

Night y’all

I love this picture and I wanted to share it with everyone……

I am sitting in an “Art Journaling” workshop for formation group. Or as I like to call it “a waste of time”

Monday’s are long for me. But I have made it through the day today. I handed in my OT midterm, I took my Spanish midterm and now I am here.

I don’t know what the rest of my week will look like. I have to sit down tonight and kind of just plan out the rest of the semester. I have to work on papers and I want to make sure that I am not staying up all night handing in a sub par paper because I was unorganized.

I went to the gym this morning and I found that when I walk on the treadmill I can really go over my Spanish flash cards. That will be so good. I am going to keep walking until I learn all the words. I started and the next thing I knew 15 min went by. Usually I am just trying to make it until 10 min.

Well I guess I should get back to class.